Crummy Church Signs

There’s not a day that goes by that I don’t weep bitter tears over the demise of the Crummy Church Signs blog.  The guy who ran that thing gave voice to a truth that I’ve always known: church signs are a bad idea.  Giving a church a marquee is like giving a dingo a baby…eventually, something’s going to go horribly wrong.

I was reminded of that truth earlier this week while driving down a rural road in the deep south.  (In the south, summer doesn’t officially begin until a church sign says, “Brother, if you think it’s hot here…”)

So I was thrilled / mortified to see these signs, all on the same road, all within 2/10 of a mile of each other:

“Are you sick and discouraged? Come inside to meet the healer.”

The  poor health theme continued on the other side of the street.  I repeat: directly across the road was where I saw this sign:

“Sick and tired of being sick and tired? Come in for some life meds, no appt. needed.”

Not to be outdone – and just in case someone didn’t recover from their sickness –  let’s go back ACROSS THE STREET, where the flip side of Church #1’s sign said this:

“The death angel knows your address.  Are you ready?”

(“Gee, Doctor, it’s the strangest thing.  Timmy’s night terrors started just about the time we started attending that new church.”)

And finally, entry #4 comes from a church just down the street from these two.  I think it’s an appropriate benediction for this post:

“Without the bread of life you’re toast”