2014 Top Ten: Weirdest Search Terms

According to my records, 2011 was the last time I waded into the year-end-review waters. That changes this week. Coming up later: 2014’s top blog posts and top reads.

But today…today we take a gander at the weirdness that people typed into The Google which – sometimes inexplicably – led them to this site. These are direct quotes, in order of my favorites. Enjoy.

10. 1001 ways to laugh your way through a language barrier. (You’re wasting your time. I can only think of 47 ways.)

9. dammy franks. (What happened? Did you hit the wrong key? Are you cussing me? WHAT IS GOING ON?)

8. (tie) most selfish people in history / husband is most selfish man in the world. (I assumed Merriem already had this site bookmarked, no need to Google it.)

7. hoggly woggly grocery fayetteville. (I understand. I too am big on the pig.)

6. ratio of how many volunteer workers to manage a stadium crowd. (Finally, some of my useless knowledge is useful to someone.)

5. doing whatever it takes for love. (Marry a selfish person? I’m beginning to see a pattern here.)

4. the gospel is offensive. (Yes it is. Here’s a post about that.)

3. summit church noise complaint durham nc. (I don’t think that’s ever happened. At least not that I’ve written about.)

2. response to boom roasted. (I’m not your guy. I think up snappy responses to snappy burns approximately six weeks too late.

1. vasectomy for mosquitoes. (I’ve lost count of the times I’ve Googled that one myself.)