Q&A: How Do I Deal with an Inconsistent Staff Leader?
Q:
I’m a volunteer on a ministry team at my church. The staff member who manages our team is inconsistent at best. How can I navigate this?
[from the 2024 blog survey]
A:
It’s hard to read a question like this without reading too much into it. (In fact, in full disclosure I tweaked the original survey topic suggestion into a question, so I’ve already muddied these waters.)
But it seems that at the very least, the energy and attention of the volunteer doesn’t match the energy and attention of the staff member who is supposed to be leading the volunteer.
So how does the volunteer deal? I think there are three simple strategies:
1. Assume the best.
When it comes to any relational friction: big or small, minor annoyance or major hiccup, we do well to realize we rarely have all the facts. Yes, this staff member is inconsistent. But why? Do they wear multiple hats on the weekend, and therefore can’t give their full attention to the team you’re on? Are they in a mismatched role for their gifts and skill sets? Do they have the green light from their supervisor to do all of the things you think they should do?
That’s why we must follow the counsel our pastor gives our staff team: “I will assume my co-workers (or in this case, staff supervisor) are smart and have good intentions.” That one phrase bats down a lot of the tension and helps us get to point number two…
2. Take the posture of cheerleader, not critic.
I’ll assume the best and guess that you either have had or soon will have a conversation with your leader. Stewing on it in silence doesn’t do either of you any good…after all, you’ll probably be mad while he or she is blissfully unaware.
But when you have that conversation, your posture, your tone, and your heart matters. Coming in hot with critiques will either (a) cause the staff member to raise their defenses and brand you as a combatant or (b) send them into a spiral of self-loathing, because they already knew they weren’t great at their job and you just confirmed it.
So build them up without blowing smoke. Point out the good things about their role and the ministry they lead. Tell stories of life change that you’ve observed. Sincerely thank them for the time and effort that they give to the team.
3. Ask “How can I help?” (And come with suggestions.)
Once #1 and #2 are shored up, it’s time for #3: building on what is and looking ahead to what could be. Ask them how you can be of service to them. Since we’re talking about inconsistency, inquire about the two or three things they have on their plate each week that they wish they could take off of their plate. Maybe you can write the weekly team email or manage the serving schedule. Perhaps you could lead an onboarding training every other month. If they have multiple Sunday hats, maybe you could offer to serve as a team lead while they’re fulfilling another role.
By the way, I have both observed this between volunteers and their staff leaders, and been a recipient of this from my own volunteers through the years. In full transparency, there have been times that it didn’t go so well (usually when #1 and #2 were ignored), but most times, it’s been a beautiful picture of the saints being equipped for the work of the ministry, and many parts making up the full body of Christ.
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