Top Ten Quotes: The Coaching Habit
Occasionally I’ll skim a book that was recommended to me, only to realize post-skim just how valuable the book was, and the need to go back for a deeper dive.
Such was the case with The Coaching Habit: Say Less, Ask More and Change the Way You Lead Forever. Highly digestible and applicable, The Coaching Habit is a must-read for anyone in leadership, anyone who struggles to put “walk-away points” at the end of a conversation, anyone who has trouble helping people process the essential next steps (I tick off all of those boxes).
Here are my top ten favorite quotes:
- …the seemingly simple behaviour change of giving a little less advice and asking a few more questions is surprisingly difficult.
- When you’re talking about people…you’re not really talking about them. You’re talking about a relationship and, specifically, about what your role is in this relationship that might currently be less than ideal.
- Better options lead to better decisions. Better decisions lead to greater success.
- Focus on the real problem, not the first problem.
- When we each understand what the other wants, we’re in the middle of an interesting and worthwhile conversation.
- [On being “the rescuer” for others] …the real insult here – to your time, effort, and good intentions – is that the recipients may not even want or need what you’re about to give them.
- [On distraction in conversations] …the wheel is spinning but the hamster is dead.
- The essence of strategy is choosing what not to do. (Michael Porter)
- People don’t really learn when you tell them something. They don’t even really learn when they do something. They start learning, start creating new neural pathways, only when they have a chance to recall and reflect on what just happened.
- …the real secret sauce here is building a habit of curiosity. The change of behaviour that’s going to serve you most powerfully is simply this: a little less advice, a little more curiosity.
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